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My LiveJournal Trick-or-Treat Haul
jessica_m1978 goes trick-or-treating, dressed up as a meth addict.
autumnquest gives you 9 light green licorice-flavoured pieces of bubblegum.
deslockdarkstar tricks you! You get a 3.5-inch floppy disc.
djkiltboy tricks you! You lose 5 pieces of candy!
evinumen tricks you! You get a rock.
iphisol gives you 11 purple banana-flavoured jawbreakers.
scottchurch gives you 1 softly glowing peach-flavoured gumdrops.
stregapez tricks you! You get a rotten egg.
theemeraldqueen gives you 6 yellow pineapple-flavoured wafers.
vincef gives you 8 dark blue mint-flavoured gummy worms.
wisdomdancer gives you 1 milky white coconut-flavoured gummy worms.
jessica_m1978 ends up with 31 pieces of candy, a 3.5-inch floppy disc, a rock, and a rotten egg.
Go trick-or-treating! Username:
Another fun meme brought to you by rfreebern.
...since we're friends and all, but this might be fun:

1 question, 1 honest answer. You can ask me one question (Comments Screened, I may reply to your inbox/e-mail) Any question, anything. No matter how awkward it can be, ill answer it honestly, no catch. But i dare you to put this as your status and see what people ask you.

Just make sure you really want to know the answer.
x-posted from jessicamorrissey.com:

I wonder if I'll ever get used to not being treated like a second class citizen.  Of course I'm not complaining that I'm not as that it's obviously a good thing.  I just don't seem to be able to take for granted things that other women don't notice.

I was a model for a photoshoot today which was VERY female-centric in terms of models (as in 2 male models and 6 female models).  This was actually the second shoot with two of the photographers, and another photographer was added to make three.  I'm still stunned that I've been asked to model twice and the second time I was requested by both of the original photographers.

Read more...Collapse )

From http://jessicamorrissey.com:

So...  yeah...  new blog...  new website...  new lots of stuff.

Some of you  know me already.  My goal is to have a lot more people who don't reading this eventually.  Eventually I'm going to write up a more formal, static page describing the purpose and mission of this site.  But for now, it's primarily a site where I try to raise money to pay for SRS.  It's also going to be my personal blog, which if I'm hosting it and paying hosting fees, even if it's not much, I'll be far more likely to keep updated.  I've been asked to model for people as well so I should have pictures of myself on here as well.  I've not determined if I'm going to have more adult-related themes here or not, but if I do, you'll have to register an account to see any of it anyway.

Originally I wanted part of this to be a resource for trans-related information in a concentrated place.  Eventually, I decided that I'd prefer to break this resource off into a separate site: http://trans-resource.com.  I haven't even started on that yet and I won't get into too many details on my plans for it here.  Point being, keep an eye out for it if it's the sort of thing that interests you.

So...  yeah...  new site...  I'll put up a static page going into more detail on the whole raising money for SRS thing.  Obviously I still have a LOT of work to do here.  In the meantime, keep checking back in and I promise I'll keep adding to it.  Oh and I tend to rant in my blog which is entertaining sometimes.


I got a card from my mother yesterday.  On the front, it said something like 'To our daughter at christmas'...  it's pretty win even if I don't really celebrate xmas.
Date: 2008-12-16 12:53:07
PostID: 960461347
Title: (missed connections) RE: Stop it
How do you think us lesbian women feel when we don't even have to make eye contact to have men trying to pick us up in real life. And even if we make it clear we're lesbian and inherently not interested, it becomes a quest to f**k the lesbian and stroke your sad little ego.More of my CL ranting and the original post...Collapse )

OK, so at the end of work yesterday I get a call from somebody outside of my department.  I'm trying to be nice to the guy but he's being a condescending asshole.  So I get off the phone and rant to coworkers and find out that I'm not the first woman in my department he's been condescending to.  So today, I write a page-long email to my supervisor:
Read more...Collapse )The email and more rant-i-ness...Collapse )
Despite me trying to be helpful and polite, Mr. xxxxx deigned it necessary to spend the call being rude and condescending.  While trying to make sure I understood what he was trying to communicate, he repeatedly felt the need to tell me I wasn't following him and that I wasn't understanding him.  He essentially demanded to know why one of the relief houseparents needed "his" password (it was the student home account, not his personal one) and why the relief houseparent needed to get into "his" account.  He continued to be very condescending when I explained that the student home account was assigned to the student home and that a relief houseparent would be given access to these accounts in order to perform their duties for that specific home for the period of time they are supervising that home.
My point here is that I feel his attitude toward me was entirely uncalled for.  I go out of my way to respectfully and efficiently assist anybody who calls me looking for help.  In return, I fully expect to be treated with respect, and Mr. xxxxx was unwilling or unable to do so.
Under normal circumstances, I'm more than willing to write things as such off as isolated incidents.  However, after hearing about other women having similar issues with this gentleman, I decided I wanted to bring this to somebody's attention to prevent it from happening in the future.  I don't want to make a big deal out of this, but I also feel my ability to provide support in a cordial, effective manner is impacted when I'm not being respected to a degree I make every effort to show to others.

So now I feel all gross and I shouldn't.  This is probably the first workplace case of sexism that I've really run into.  I thought it was bullshit what the guy did and how he acted so I spoke up.  I had every right to, and maybe even a sense of personal responsibility to.  But I can't help  but feel like sexism is a commonplace workplace element, and while it's DEFINITELY fucked, I haven't experienced enough of it personally to have the right to complain when it's directed to me.  There's also being pissed because it looks like I'm like 'oh noes, i was treated badly now that i'm perceived as female, i want my male privilege back, wah'

It's total bullshit.  I did something that aligns with my personal sense of ethics and I still fucking feel bad about it.  Like I'm obligated to let myself be shit on like a lot of other women, more so because I haven't experienced it first hand for all that long.  Despite the fact that more women should stand up for themselves and other women and for a fair workplace environment in general.  And knowing this, I still feel bad.

Fuck society for encouraging me to feel guilty for doing what I feel is right. 
</div></div>The email and more rant-i-ness...Collapse )</div>
As a disclaimer, I don't have any issue with BEING trans.  I mean I'm not proud OR ashamed of it, much like I'm not proud or ashamed of being of predominately Irish heritage or female.  They're just things that are.

However, I am sort of tired of dealing with hassles relating to being trans.  I recently applied to a bunch of seasonal mall jobs: The Limited, NY & Company, Victoria's Secret, Bath and Body Works.  I had an interview at NY&Co this evening after my forreal job.  I thought it went pretty well overall, but I sort of got forced into disclosing that I'm trans simply because it'd come up in background checks as well as reference checks from former employers.

It's not so much that I have an issue with people knowing.  It's just that once you're labeled as 'the trans chick' any other label applied to you ends up being pretty ancillary.  And right now, I'm at a stage in my life where being trans isn't something I want to be defined as primarily.  I mean, I could be that chick who works at a school during the day, or who quit TaeKwanDo over perceived ideological conflicts, or even the girl who wears too much eye makeup and looks like a shitty corporate version of a goth chick.  Being trans just isn't significant in my day to day life and it sort of irritates the fuck out of me that I'm sort of forced into that identity by simple things like getting a job selling clothes over Xmas.
OK so last nite I was going to go to the gym, but procrastinated because I was all self-conscious about going swimming, or more accurately being seen in public in a swimsuit.  So I end up getting coffee from starbucks and driving out to my friend Reni's house.   I'd been talking to her on the intarwebs but this was the first time I'd met her in person.  So she's all like...  gothy and steampunky and introduced me to Repo! The Genetic Opera which is made out of win.  So overall she's pretty awesome.  She's also black.  I almost didn't want to separate her being black out from all the explicitly awesome stuff in the first list, as that I'm not trying to say being black isn't awesome.  But that's what I'm sort of pissed off about.  I was sort of like, how cool is that, a gothy steampunky black girl.  But the more I thought about it, the more I was like...  that is SO fucked.  That I thought it the fact that the intersection of a style of life that's more traditionally a part of white culture and being black somehow made her superior.  I mean forreal, wtf is up with that?  I mean, by thinking that, it's almost like I'm saying somebody is superior for eschewing a culture typically associated with being black.  I guess I'm sort of pissed off that I for some reason find a black person listening to combichrist more interesting than a black person watching 106 and Park.

So that is seriously fucked.  I mean I'm a poly trans lesbian, so of all people, I should have an appreciation for cultural diversity and fluidity.  And if I'm thinking shit like that, what does it say for the rest of Western culture?  People like to talk about racism and sexism being old issues that we've moved past.  I'm totally calling bullshit.  I mean if you follow my thought process to it's logical conclusion, on some level, I think black people engaging in their own culture, god fucking forbid, makes them inferior.  And that is a HUGE glass of anglo-centric fucked up.
Allright so some people know I've been dating a girl who's explicitly non-monogamous, thus introducing me into the world of non-monogamy (results posted in non-public filtered parts). Well, she broke up with her long term boyfriend fairly recently, so she's sort of upset about that so I haven't really talked to her in a week or two. Originally, I was just like... whatever, I guess I did something that pissed her off or lost her interest. That had me pretty upset for a while as that everybody wants to feel desired. So I found out about the boyfriend thing last nite, and one thing she said was that she didn't want me to be a rebound relationship and asked if we could just be friends for now.

More about why Holly apparently doesn"t hate me and gratuitious swimsuit photo...Collapse )